{"id":405,"date":"2025-08-28T10:19:01","date_gmt":"2025-08-28T16:19:01","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/yamairah.com\/?p=405"},"modified":"2025-08-28T11:01:01","modified_gmt":"2025-08-28T17:01:01","slug":"audhd-at-work-how-i-deal-with-toxic-coworkers","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/yamairah.com\/?p=405","title":{"rendered":"AuDHD at Work: How I Deal with Toxic Coworkers"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

As an Autistic person with ADHD, I have strong pattern recognition<\/a><\/strong> and an immense amount of justice sensitivity<\/a><\/strong>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

So, seeing the same patterns of toxicity repeat themselves at work is discouraging as fuck, to say the least.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I\u2019ve tried almost all of the advice mentioned in articles on toxicity in the workplace:<\/h2>\n\n\n\n
    \n
  • Documenting instances in writing and via screenshots.<\/li>\n\n\n\n
  • Sharing documentation with management and HR.<\/li>\n\n\n\n
  • Cooperating with an external contractor who was brought in to \u201chelp\u201d.<\/li>\n\n\n\n
  • Building internal alliances with staff who are also negatively impacted.<\/li>\n\n\n\n
  • Distancing myself from toxic coworkers and situations.<\/li>\n\n\n\n
  • Empowering my direct reports to do the same.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n\n\n\n

    The one thing that I have not<\/em> tried yet is leaving. <\/h2>\n\n\n\n

    Every article or piece of advice on toxic workplaces suggests leaving if you can. I don\u2019t think that\u2019s fair. And I know, I know\u2026 \u201cLife isn\u2019t fair.\u201d But\u2026<\/p>\n\n\n\n

    Why should I<\/em><\/strong>, or any other top performers, have to leave a steady pay with benefits over unchecked toxic behavior?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

    Fuck that shit.<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

    Organizations should not hollow themselves out for the sake of protecting toxic employees. Employees should not accept toxic behavior, nor should they feel the need to leave an organization (and, let\u2019s be real, end up finding the same shit in a different toilet somewhere else).<\/p>\n\n\n\n

    \n

    Ignoring toxic behavior in the workplace does not benefit taxpayers. <\/strong><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n\n\n\n

    And that\u2019s ultimately who I and other government employees are accountable to, the taxpayer<\/strong>, not the organizational structures that uphold toxic behavior and drive good employees out.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

    The grass is not greener on the other side. We have to fix the side we\u2019re on.<\/h2>\n\n\n\n

    For various personal reasons, I don\u2019t think I\u2019ll be leaving my current organization any time soon. And, this behavior – albeit egregious – is just a small pocket of an org where lots of great work is being done by amazing people everyday. I feel lucky to work alongside many of my colleagues. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

    Some articles on this subject suggest not talking about these experiences until after you leave. I am no longer sure that final piece of advice is helpful for me.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

    So, here I am, trying the last thing I haven\u2019t tried yet: speaking publicly about my experience. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

    At the very least, it may help someone who is experiencing similar issues know they\u2019re not alone, they\u2019re not crazy, and they can find community with people who are also experiencing the same thing.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

    I see you.<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

    <\/p>\n\n\n\n

    Please share this post if it resonates with you, or you want to show solidarity. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

    And if you\u2019re tired of toxicity in the workplace, leave a comment with the poop emoji. <\/strong>?<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

    Thoughts on having strong pattern recognition and an immense amount of justice sensitivity while working with toxic coworkers, and how those impacted by toxicity can try to break the cycle.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":9317859,"featured_media":412,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_et_pb_use_builder":"","_et_pb_old_content":"","_et_gb_content_width":"","_coblocks_attr":"","_coblocks_dimensions":"","_coblocks_responsive_height":"","_coblocks_accordion_ie_support":"","_crdt_document":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[783510325],"tags":[27891,182492,783510350,194092338,1765055,395690,220213610,79074,87334,80294252,783510346],"class_list":["post-405","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-audhd-at-work-2","tag-adhd","tag-adult-autism","tag-audhd-at-work","tag-autistic-burnout","tag-employee-experience","tag-good-government","tag-justice-sensitivity","tag-managing-people","tag-pattern-recognition","tag-toxic-coworkers","tag-work"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/yamairah.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/08\/a-rahmat-mn-iqzwcx7oyt0-unsplash.jpg","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/yamairah.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/405","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/yamairah.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/yamairah.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/yamairah.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/9317859"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/yamairah.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=405"}],"version-history":[{"count":9,"href":"https:\/\/yamairah.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/405\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":418,"href":"https:\/\/yamairah.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/405\/revisions\/418"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/yamairah.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/412"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/yamairah.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=405"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/yamairah.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=405"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/yamairah.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=405"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}